Learning to Live

I'm trying, I'm so trying.
I love posting here I love writing down these thoughts that will keep me awake at night. thoughts about what my husband MAY be thinking.

Of course its all just speculation.

As its just a separation. I'm not an ex-wife. He is not my ex-husband.
He knows how i feel about him and how much I would love to love him.

I'm waiting to find some sense
of strength
I'm begging you from the
bottom of my heart to show
me understanding

I still dont understand any of this. I'm really trying.. I've just somewhat found acceptance for my situation. I'm no longer in denial that he doesnt love me. But its still just a separation.

Heh.. call and answer, BNL.

If you call i will answer. Which is true. He needs his space. I know it, he knows it. Still my heart and door are always there and open. (and some people are thinking here, yea for more abuse) What can I say.. that I havent said before.