Kicks after Six
Today was just an ordinary day. I wouldnt say it was good. It wasnt bad either.
My anxiety wasnt as bad as other days. Which was a plus.
The heavyness in my chest as well as a few other symptoms just never seem to go away these days.
I looked up the symptoms of anxiety, and it explained about the nausea thats an almost daily occurance. I never feel so nauseated that I get physically sick, just usually a queasyness/uneasyness.
Then theres the shaking, which could be from a low blood sugar or perhaps not.
And a few others, which theres no need to get into.
Something funny at work today, a lady came up to pay for her leg waxing, and I told her the price. She is like is that for 1 leg or two. I just cracked up right there. I was like yes, its for both legs. Spa humor.
Tonight I watched most of The Virgin Suicides. Very odd, but very short movie. Tomorrow I will watch the rest of it.
BUt today was, just average. One more day of work til I get a day off. Then I have to head to goodwill and buy some new pants as I've lost to much weight to keep any of my other pants up. I also need to find a couple more tops for summer.
I hope to fit in my polka dot dress by the end of the month. Cause it would be awesome to wear it on my birthday. Tomorrow I'm going to the gym. I feel the need to go. Tonights dinner was 1 chicken breast, some pasta roni shit, and a chocolate pudding with a small handfull of chocolate chips. One of these days I will eat a vegetable* again.
I got called to go out tonight with sensei at a fremont bar. I felt the need for quiet movie watching, some what of a real dinner, and going to bed early. I said, for him to keep me in mind for next week however.
I cancelled my reiki appointment. I didnt want to pay 50$ for it. So maybe I will just get my hair done instead. I need a cut. My hair looked so damn good today however, great curl formation. Its always a better day when my hair looks good. Today I looked pretty damn cute. And as I was walking back to work after my lunch, the wind was blowing just right, my hair bouncing and flowing in the breeze, I just felt so wonderful, I even strutted/modeled a little bit as if the sidewalk was a catwalk. Thinking about it makes me smile. Doing that made me smile even more. As if nature was helping me understand how beautiful I am. Gosh that sounds awful boastful doesnt it. But after 20+ years of thinking I was the ugliest thing, I have some ground to make up.
I have no regrets today.
*plant matter, not the brain dead.
My anxiety wasnt as bad as other days. Which was a plus.
The heavyness in my chest as well as a few other symptoms just never seem to go away these days.
I looked up the symptoms of anxiety, and it explained about the nausea thats an almost daily occurance. I never feel so nauseated that I get physically sick, just usually a queasyness/uneasyness.
Then theres the shaking, which could be from a low blood sugar or perhaps not.
And a few others, which theres no need to get into.
Something funny at work today, a lady came up to pay for her leg waxing, and I told her the price. She is like is that for 1 leg or two. I just cracked up right there. I was like yes, its for both legs. Spa humor.
Tonight I watched most of The Virgin Suicides. Very odd, but very short movie. Tomorrow I will watch the rest of it.
BUt today was, just average. One more day of work til I get a day off. Then I have to head to goodwill and buy some new pants as I've lost to much weight to keep any of my other pants up. I also need to find a couple more tops for summer.
I hope to fit in my polka dot dress by the end of the month. Cause it would be awesome to wear it on my birthday. Tomorrow I'm going to the gym. I feel the need to go. Tonights dinner was 1 chicken breast, some pasta roni shit, and a chocolate pudding with a small handfull of chocolate chips. One of these days I will eat a vegetable* again.
I got called to go out tonight with sensei at a fremont bar. I felt the need for quiet movie watching, some what of a real dinner, and going to bed early. I said, for him to keep me in mind for next week however.
I cancelled my reiki appointment. I didnt want to pay 50$ for it. So maybe I will just get my hair done instead. I need a cut. My hair looked so damn good today however, great curl formation. Its always a better day when my hair looks good. Today I looked pretty damn cute. And as I was walking back to work after my lunch, the wind was blowing just right, my hair bouncing and flowing in the breeze, I just felt so wonderful, I even strutted/modeled a little bit as if the sidewalk was a catwalk. Thinking about it makes me smile. Doing that made me smile even more. As if nature was helping me understand how beautiful I am. Gosh that sounds awful boastful doesnt it. But after 20+ years of thinking I was the ugliest thing, I have some ground to make up.
I have no regrets today.
*plant matter, not the brain dead.
posted by B at 11:14 PM
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